162mc – Analysis

Script Writing Process

This is the orginal script idea. My orginal concept was to have a message revealed at the end of the short film that left the audience with a lasting image if you like. I feel I achieved this by the structure of narrative as it is a sensitive story, using the emotion of the situation and the character. As the story happends mainly in the hospital, in terms of mis-en-scene it is very simple yet effectively and I feel that by not using many locations it keeps the narrative strong.

The Outline

Ella has never had what you would call a “normal life”, a simple life. If it wasn’t hospital appointments or checkups it was being told to be careful and being told what she must and mustn’t do, every second of every day. Ella was born with a weak heart and even the doctors didn’t think she would live past her second birthday. Twelve years later and Ella is still fighting the battle just to stay alive.

Ella could never do things that the other kids did, she wasn’t allowed to play sports, run very far on her own, play on the swings or in the playground without someone their ready to catch her or inject her. It never stopped Ella fighting or dreaming of the future she knew may never come.

Ella is back in the hospital again for her next operation, waiting in the hospital bed for the process to begin she hears a knock at the door, as she goes to find out who’s at the door she finds no one is at the door or even outside. The place is empty, deserted. Ella steps out the room to see a white figured blur running past her as she tried to follow it and run after them she collapses on the floor. A nurse runs over to her and helps her back to her room. Ella asks the nurse if she can hear it too, the knocking noise. The nurse stares blankly back at Ella with a puzzled and confused look upon her face.

Why can Ella only hear this knock, is it all inside her head, is she going mad. If so what does it mean and why can she only hear it?

The Treatment

ACT ONE – DAY-AFTERNOON -Hospital room, private cubicle ELLA is sitting on the bed looking over a BROWN old fashioned, worn photo album. It cuts to show her parents JOHN,LISA talking to the doctor behind a small blinded window.

FLASHBACK  ONE – (PAST) Ella- FIVE is running with her mum LISA behind her arms at the ready, showing a motion of being ready to catch her and being cautious and over protective. Three or four children playing around Ella, jumping,running,playing showing the things that Ella can’t do. Ella’s facial expression indicates envy and sadness.


FLASHBACK TWO – (PAST) (REAL EVENTS) Ella – EIGHT/NINE In hospital bed wires going inside her and coming out. Linked up to monitors. Donor operation preparation.

Back to Ella (PRESENT DAY) in hospital bed again, wakes up dreary and half asleep. Rolls over and finds a bible placed on the stand next to the bed.  Ella picks up the bible and begins flicking through it. Reading bits looking for hope/reassurance/faith. Hears a knock at the door, Ella walks over to open door no one is there, both her parents and the doctors have gone. Thinking nothing of it Ella climbs back into bed and carries on reading the bible. Ella starts to feel tired again as her eyes start to flutter and slowly close she falls back asleep, letting the bible fall onto the floor.

FLASHBACK  THREE– (FUTURE) (DREAM) ELLA – In surgery being operated on , heart transplant being performed. The operation was a success and Ella gets a new heart. CUTS to show her running down a track – HAPPY, HEALTHY – Reaching the finishing line.  In a WHITE MISTY CLOUDY MISE-EN-SCENE.

Back to Ella (PRESENT DAY) Nurse enters the hospital room, checks blood pressure, tubes and temperature, smiles at Ella and turns to exit room when notices a NOTE on the floor, hands it to Ella placing it on the bed and exits room. ELLA looks at the note, unfolding it and scans over it reading what is written. Note has scribbled on it– “Ask and it will be given to you” Ella looks at the note, looking not particular very interested scrunches it up in her hand and throws it in the bin. The KNOCKING gets louder and ELLA rubs her temple. She gets off the bed and begins to search the room to find where it is coming from.She hears the same noise coming from the window – window is see through – and no one is outside the room although the NOISE CONTINUES.

FLASHBACK FOUR – (PRESENT)  ELLA is at her bedroom at home. Staring at a CALENDAR on the wall with a big RED circle on 27th JUNE . She runs her finger over that particular circle.

Back to ELLA in hospital bed, stares down at her hand. A red ink stain is on her fingers .

LOCATION CHANGES – Parents JOHN, LISA sitting in the CHAPEL. JOHN is praying and Lisa is resting her head on this shoulders. LISA picks up cup from under place mat – Written in BOLD LETTERING  “7.7 seek and you shall find”

Back to ELLA – Going through her bag and pulling out a notebook. She rips a piece of paper out and grabs the pen off the side – writes on the piece of paper “I want to live” she folds it up and places it inside her t-shirt, the side nearest her heart and CLOSES HER EYES.

The knock changes into a HEARTBEAT sound. STRONG and BEATING.

The process of the 162 short film.

Over the christmas period, Indiviually we needed to have finshed our scripts and have proof read it ready for when we came back. The next step was to get into groups and then decide who’s script we would use to film the short film. The group of people I decided to work with were people who I had worked with previously but I felt most comfortable with them, plus because I had worked with them on the last assignment I now know where there strengths and weaknesses lie.
The first group discussion involved each member explaining their script idea in depth and from this we all made a group decision to go with the script we all felt most comfortable with and which could work best.  We discussed characters,filming locations, props this way we could begin to visualise the idea and what preparation is needed in order to begin filming. After much group talk we decided to go with emma’s idea, I personally feel that it fits the brief :
A: There is a hammering on a door, it opens to reveal a dishevelled breathless person, why? How did they get this way…

B: There is a hammering on a door, why? Dare the door be opened? If so

what is revealed….

We wanted to be very careful that while we continue through the scriptwriting process that we stick to the brief and that our scripts met the brief requirements. Therefore this was one of the my main objective in our minds throughout the process.
Group Meeting – 10 am – Ellen Terry Buidling.
Members Present : (Myself) ,Emma Fielder, Jessica Wilkinson, Jenny Sheen.
I decided to call a meeting in order for all of the group members to meet and plan everything for the filming as we need to film asap. I wanted to be able to get organised and get everybody on board and in the same place, so that we are all involved with the filming process.
I felt it was extremely important for every one in the group to have an indepth understanding of the script, we decided in a previous group meeting to go with Emma’s script as we felt that it used the “knock” most creativitly and was a good, simple idea for us to work with.
After Emma explained the script in her own words we then made a synopsis of what our short film was going to be about, I felt this was a good idea as it would then help me to inform the actors as to what the film was about and the character roles they would be playing.
 Summary of Storyline (Written by Jess with our thoughts and ideas) :
Lisa lives alone and is an epic fail at D.IY. There is a knock at the door and she opens it to reveal an electrician waiting there. He comes in and ironically get electrocuted. Lisa freaks out and there is a second knock at the door. It is her friend KATE and she notices that lisa is acting werid. Shes goes to investigate the body and gets electrocuted too. Lisa panickes and calls her brother round. RICH comes over and looks around after hearing lisa’s story but he cant find anything. He turns to lisa and asks “Have you taken your meds today”.
We decided to go with emma’s script, instead of the other script ideas in the group because we liked the narrative and at the time it felt the best script to work with and we could experiment with angles and camera movements. This would then help us when it came to the editing as we would have more footage to experiment with and do what we wanted, instead of limiting ourselves.
Overall the decisions I made during the editing were experimently mainly as I have not done a lot of editing before and it was rather new to me. Some of the editing I am not happy with and could have done with  improving but at the end of the day. I feel ive done the best I can in the time I had left to work in. I have learnt a lot about using final cut and the editing process, I now would like to put that into practice and hopefully keep improving on my editing skills.

About allyprentice2810

I am a young media proffesional, experimenting with different mediums of media to find my niche. Studying Media Production at Coventry University.
This entry was posted in 162 MC - Developing A Narrative. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s